Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Seasons

This season of my life has been comparably better than the past few. Last spring I was getting ready to lead a trip to the Middle East, and had a little bit of spiritual battle that really took a toll on me for part of the semester, but it really in the end helped me draw closer to friends here in Lansing, and develop some great relationships of people that really care for me, and support me.
Then the summer was great, kind of a blur traveling, leading, learning responsibilities, and just seeing and experiencing the world.
Coming back from the summer, I crashed, physically, emotionally, and spiritually drained. I was sleeping 11 hours a night for a couple weeks, and right as I was getting on my feet, it was back into the fall semester. I went in thinking I had lots of energy, and I was ready to tackle the new semester. Quickly I realized I wasn't. I got overwhelmed so quickly getting surrounded by activities and meeting new people. I think I was just hitting a hard season of my life. I felt like God had a lot of work he wanted to do in me. Help face things I have never actually dealt with, but instead just shoved down again and again. He needed me to be stripped of all the other things, and have me at a place where I was pretty raw before I would actually look at myself and see who I am, and what makes me me. I felt sort of like Job, and how Satan asked for permission to "sift" him. I felt like I was being sifted this fall, and was not found wanting. If anything, it proved to me how strong my faith is. That even in the midst of some of my lowest feeling times, I still grasped onto the Lord for dear life. well at least it felt like that. He is my lifeline, and I felt like he brought me through some things that were painful, some seemed out of the blue. Over and over and over again though he would use what was going on in my life, so I could help others dealing with the same things!!!
Yesterday I talked to a girl that told me how she was struggling with some things in her life, and even doubting her faith, even though logically she still knew it to be true. It was so cool to be able to sit with her, and encourage her. I feel like most people who claim they are Christians would probably have condemned her for doubting her faith, or tried to give her a pat answer. I was able to just speak truth to her, and let her know she's not alone. Others, even the strongest Christians doubt. 1 Peter 5 says how all over the world the family of God is facing similar things. I myself have doubted many times, but I am faced with John 6:66-69 - "Lord to whom shall we go? Only you have the words of Eternal life"
I am so thankful now for all the different seasons I've been through. It's helped me learn more about myself, what makes me tick, and really be able to relate to others in a way I never could have before.
It's so hard when you are in a difficult season. We are never promised it will be easy. But we are PROMISED hope. "(Christ speaking)I have told you these things so that you may have peace in me. In this would there will be many tribulations, but take heart I have overcome the world" John 16:33
I am now ready for the next season!!!! I currently have a boyfriend (new territory for me!) it's so weird to be in a relationship because I've always been the single friend for the past 9 years, and now suddenly I'm the one with a boyfriend. It's cool learning a LOT about relationships. Not just with him, but about how we relate to people in general. It's cool seeing God love me through him, and I am just enjoying the ride!
Thank you too for all your prayers for me. It's really been helpful for me the past few seasons, and has helped me pull through, even if you didn't know everything that was going on. I appreciate you and look forward to the continuation of the journey before me. bumps along the road and everything!

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